Runnin On Empty

This time of year usually has us reflecting, looking back and looking forward, maybe thinking of  changes we'd like to make?  and as I stroll down what often feels like the psychiatric corridors of Facebook I can't help thinking  I haven't done too badly.   Each and every one of us has a story and most have their struggles but I generally find the best medicine for misery is to focus on others. As someone who  lives a Yogic life  it's the first mantra of my day "What can I do to make someone elses day better today?" it's not about big gestures it's about the small stuff and it's something that we are all able to do regardless of age, health or circumstances.  By thinking of others & helping others without any expectations for self, we can often learn alot and that in itself can be  healing. Talking of healing, can we make a deal to banish last gasp selfies please ? This year my feed has been awash with open backed hospital gowns...

I thought I'd write a little  article about the reasoning  behind my latest  merchandise design: Limited Edition until 20th November, Men & Womens. International delivery " M.E! It's Not Just For Christmas" All profit from sales donated to Charity   Invest In ME Research   .  Available from  my DizzyJam store. It's not just Christmas that's difficult for someone with M.E, but there is often added pressure from family and friends with their expectations when it comes to the annual get together: " Well surely you can make an effort just for one day, come on, you"ll be fine?" "Auntie flo will be so disappointed  if you don't turn up, can't you do it for her?" "Stop being selfish and thinking of yourself, it's Christmas, think of someone else for a change?" " Yes I know you've got M.E but what's that got to do with us holding the celebrations at your house this year, you've got  m...

Today marks two years since we lost Michele, my sister, so how does it feel?  Well no less painful than it was that day 21st October 2015 when she was taken from us. But I have learnt many things, that grief is an individual journey, one that we must travel alone, because what works for one doesn't necessarily work for another and no journey is wrong or right, just right for the one walking it. So from my own path I can tell you that time doesn't heal and things don't get better, how could things possibly ever get better when the people you love the most have gone?  As the realization of that began to creep in I likened it to when I was first diagnosed with the illness M.E & stripped of everything that I thought made me who I was, job, social life, identity  & place in the world, that too was an all consuming grief and that's why this feels similar.  when we lost Michele from Cancer and also my brother Michael 5 months beforehand through Suicid...

So a leaflet just dropped through the letterbox with  "George for Mayor, Let's Work Together" emblazoned on the front. My first thought was......... But it was accompanied with a picture, turns out it wasn't the George I was thinking of after all, but someone called George Jabbour. So he was born in Watford right?  Has Watford running through his blood? Loves the town and its people with a passion that only a Watfordian can and that's why we know he'll do the best for us huh?   Er...no,  He c ame to the Uk 13 yrs ago and has a degree in Engineering from Damascus University though? So....where's the  connection to Watford? He did start up a small business to help governments with their finances? Yep, but what about Watford?  He  become a British Citizen in 2011 because they accepted his a highly skilled migrant? Yes, well done him an all that, but Watford? He campaigned for Scotland to stay in the UK? Yeah but what about.........

I'm pretty exasperated right now at the ignorance, insensitivity  and what I consider offensive attitude of my local GP practice, not that I'm surprised, just mega disappointed that they still evidently have no real understanding about Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (M.E). The anger isn't just for myself  it's never been about me, it's about M.E and the constant ignorance, arrogance, and prejudice that still sadly  surrounds it, and that thousands suffering with have to face on a daily basis. Just when you think progress is being made in terms of awareness and real understanding?..... Today a  letter  dropped through the door from my local surgery: "Dear *******   ******* Surgery    are pleased to announce the introduction of a new free service to patients who would like help & support to become more active. We have a Get Active specialist available to work with adults who are currently inactive and would like to find out more about oppo...

As some of you may recall at the beginning of January I purchased a piece of exercise equipment called the "Wondercore   Smart" in yet another attempt to look more like   Beyonce than Blobby in terms of buffness?   Erm….lets just say that once again things haven’t gone according   to plan, even though n o Cheesecake has entered the building and n o sneaky Doughnut   passed these lips,  so what's going on?  Turns out, exercise is sending my body into trauma....yes really.   I'm not in the best of health tis true, but why would a totally healthy person have similar problems?  Well since I started my research I discovered that It can happen for a number of reasons: Eating and drinking too close to exercising, or eating  certain foods that take a long time to digest or aggravate the stomach lining. While in exercise mode, blood is moved away from the intestines to the body part you're working on, this impairs the dige...

It could be argued that most of us creative types are self-indulgent & I wouldn't disagree,  but once in a very rare blue moon, it's taken to a whole other level of genius. The last time I listened to such an album was Kanye Wests "My beautiful dark twisted fantasy" And then along comes the folk equivalent in kate Dimbleby                                Her Songbirds album recorded and released on the Independent Folkstock label 23rd February & produced by Lauren Deakin Davies is an absolute corker.  The album is acapella, something we haven't had in the mainstream for many years and by layering her vocals Kate creates an exciting backing ambience that dances around & cradles her main vocal, techniques that were inspired by her time in New York learning from  Bobby "Don't Worry Be Happy" Mcferrin". The daughter of broadcaster David Dimbleby and classically trained mother Josceline,...

Once upon a time when I was  six years old I had this delusion that one day a prince would come galloping down our Council estate on a white charger, scoop me up onto the back of his horse and ride off into the sunset. We'd get married and have four kids, Lazzard, Icarus, Rainbow & Lyric and live happily ever after.....yes okay, I had an extremely vivid imagination for a little girl...... However, at the age of eleven my parents divorced and I was hit with that great big wrecking ball of reality and have remained single ever since. That's not to say I don't believe in Love, I just prefer to have love for everyone and everything rather than the one to one scenario.  Granted there are many difficult people  in the world, and you might not necessarily like all of them, but you can still have love for them because they can teach you how not to be. Love is a very powerful thing and while I know I run the risk of being carted off by the men in whites coats, ...