Runnin On Empty

Wednesday 6th May 2015  started out a day like any other. As someone in ill health, I was sitting at my desk in my bedroom working on the laptop, think of todays  Isolation/Lockdown only 24 years worth courtesy of M.E ?  My mother had just entered the bedroom when my phone rang, it was my sister Michele, I did my usual cheery " Hi Smell, you okay?" but she sounded awkward, she asked if mum was with me, at which point Mum came over and sat at the end of my bed thinking I was about to hand the phone over. Then my sister said  " Stacy, I have some bad news"  I immediately thought it was my Dad, I mean  we tend to think  life goes in order don't we, even if that's totally false? which of course it is.  As I felt that  sickening fight or flight adrenaline start to course through my body and braced myself  for   what she was about to say next, absolutely nothing could've  prepared me.  " I'm sorry, it's really ...

I wasn't planning on turning this article into a trilogy, but then when it comes to mental health in the UK there's plenty to say. My interest  hasn't been from choice as such  but more of a spiritual persuasion  and if i'm honest there's still very much a love hate battle going on . I have been surrounded in some way or another throughout life by just about every mental health issue you can think of. I did everything I could to avoid it before coming to the conclusion I'm not the sole author of my life story and someone up there has other ideas.  Even on rare shopping trips out due to the limitation of M.E & Fibromyalgia I would often  find myself cornered by a stranger who would go from saying "hallo"  to suddenly blurting out their entire mental health life story from sectionings to psychotic drugs and back again.   Of course I could've just walked away, only I couldn't, despite part of me wanting to run and hide behind the curt...

Continuing on from  Mental Health Madness PT1   having already had the hurdle of trying to see a GP, I decided as a writer to do what I believe many in desperate need won't do, and that's to fill in the Wellbeing  Centres online seven-page questionnaire to try and access the service?  The question that shocked me the most was on the last page, it asked if I was thinking of committing Suicide and if so had I planned how I was going to do it? There was then a box where I'm asked to describe exactly HOW I would do it?  I have to admit there was a mixture of shock, anger and sarcastic thoughts buzzing through my head at this point.   Once you've seen a question you can't unsee it and I think it's just human nature, curiosity and automatic reaction to do that theoretical thing, where your inner head Chimp goes "Oh okay, well I wouldn't commit suicide but if I did how WOULD I do it?  I was tempted to write in the box "I'm thinking of...

Many of the Mental health services in Hertfordshire are appallingly inadequate,  It's probably the same all over the country, but I prefer to stick to fact rather than assumption and as someone that lives in Watford Hertfordshire I know it to be true. It 's not that it was any better in "The good ol days". I remember many years ago a young girl of 14  taking an overdose, after getting her to hospital to have her stomach pumped we were told it was a 6-8 wk wait before she could be assessed for appropriate  treatment /Counselling and then another few months wait before she could start that treatment/Counselling. In the meantime, if things got too bad she could "Ring the Samaritans"    You mean that organisation where it's like talking to a brick wall and where  they  keep asking if you're thinking of taking your own life until it feels more like a suggestion than a question?  Yes, that organisation.  Fast forward to 2018, I've...

I've recently been contacted by a number of rather upset patients that come under West Herts Hospitals NHS trust, who while waiting for their Op date for medical conditions have suddenly received a letter to basically inform them they are too fat and can't have the Op after all.  The Trust have seemingly rolled out a new policy with a total lack of communication between departments, meaning even those at the hospital that should know about it......didn't. As a regular reader & follower of the Column I used to write at the Watford Obs, I know one of the patients involved and was shocked to say the least when she contacted me on this matter, because while like most of us she could do with losing a few pounds, which she readily admits herself,  she is not what you would describe as fat or obese.   When I started getting contacted by other patients with exactly the same issue I felt it needed bringing to public attention so that others can ...